The Dark Secrets Behind the Betting Frenzy on Pope Leo: Who’s Really Cashing In?

So there you have it—a new papal sheriff rides into town, and his name’s Leo XIV, the first bona fide American to snag the keys to St. Peter’s kingdom. But before you start polishing your prayer beads, here’s the kicker: a clutch of sharp bettors quietly turned this spiritual upset into cold, hard cash. No, I’m not talking March Madness brackets gone wild—this was the real deal, gambling hard-earned dollars on who would don the papal mitre. Imagine placing a grand on a 0.3% longshot and waking up Pope-rich. Did they have insider info? Divine whisper? Or just guts of steel? Either way, it’s a wild new frontier—where the sacred meets the speculative, and the holy has a handicap line. Who knew the vatican conclave could be the next big betting bonanza? Is nothing truly untouchable anymore?

LEARN MORE.

In case you’ve been living under a rock, there’s a new papal sheriff in town and his name is Leo.

Pope Leo XIV became the first American to be elected Pope on Thursday, but that’s not important.

What is important is that a small group of savvy bettors made off like bandits backing the underdog from Villanova.

But I’m not talking about March Madness!

That’s right, in the year of our Lord 2025, you can place your actual hard-earned money on which Cardinal will be elected to serve as the Pope.

While many hitched their wagons to the odds-on favorite, Cardinal Pietro Parolin, the sharp money was on our newest Supreme Pontiff, who just hours before the white smoke billowed out of the Vatican sat at just a 0.3% chance of winning the papacy, according to Polymarket.

And for a select few, Pope Leo XIV’s election netted them a BIG payday.

Now that’s what we call a Papal Payday!

Apparently, some of the bets placed on Leo, formerly known as Cardinal Robert Prevost of Chicago, were north of $1,000.

Can you imagine the gambling hotline conversation taking place between some poor schmuck at the call center and the degenerate that placed a stack on a 0.3% dark horse to win the freaking papacy?

One has to wonder if these bettors had some sort of inside knowledge, perhaps even divine intervention guiding them to the right bets.

Regardless, it’s taking me a little time getting used to living in a world where morally unscrupulous individuals can actually gamble on whom the next Pope will be.

Is nothing sacred these days?

I mean, first we have CBS anchors getting all horned up thinking about Priests having sex, using terminology like “rawdogging” (surely to appeal to the youths), and now people are placing wagers on little-known Cardinals to be elected to a holy institution.

What’s next, scatologically inclined road-ragers having Only Fans accounts?

Oh wait, we already covered that.